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Today October 24, 2014

Art History Lesson

Written by Rudy on March 17, 2011 - 7:58 am -

This is another one of these typical Rudy Report Thursday editions that you have gotten used to, especially on Thursdays, which is when they usually come out, like today on "National Rudy Report Appreciation Day." As you know, Rudy loves art. Therefore, all of you must love art as well. Today, we are taking a look at something very historic. The world's first ever facepalm...

Facepalm 1_1

Renewed political clashes in the streets of Bahrain have virtually eliminated the country's chance of hosting a Formula One race this year. The New York Yankees payroll could fall below $200 million for the first time since 2007. And, in the UEFA Champions League, there were no surprises today: Real Madrid beat Lyon, and Chelsea advanced against Copenhagen.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Edin Dzeko, Aaron Baddeley, Danny Ainge, and Uruguayan soccer legend Alvaro Recoba. On this day in 1845, the rubber band was patented. Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but learn something important about cookies in the Random Fact section!

Not So Fast - Major League Baseball has imposed certain limits on the New York Mets' sale of its team debt in order to protect the franchise. Read here.

As Seen On TV - Former Nashville Predators fraud investor William "Boots" del Biaggio III will be featured in an "American Greed" episode on CNBC. Read here.

The Sound Of Music - Celine Dion's husband may join a group that is trying to bring a National Hockey League franchise to Quebec City. Read here.

Partner Replacement Products

Written by Rudy on March 16, 2011 - 3:40 am -

This is the 1,102nd edition of the Rudy Report and there is no meltdown in sight as we continue to deliver the best report in the world, even to contaminated areas, today on "National Lips Appreciation Day." Anyways, just in case you don't find a partner on eHarmony or when your baby is traveling, there is no need to make a sad face. No! Several products have come on the market that function as a genuine, sometimes less annoying, replacements, like this one right here...


Dwight Howard may be traded to the Los Angeles Lakers either next season or in two years. The Rudy Report endorses Duke as the team that will go on to win the NCAA men's basketball tournament. There are bigger favorites, but Duke will do it. In the UEFA Champions League, Bayern Munich suffered a devastating loss at home against Inter Milan. They got eliminated in the last minute. The Italians probably cheated... Manchester United beat Marseille to advance to the quarterfinals. In the NBA, the Knicks lost against Indiana. And, in the NHL, the Rangers beat the Islanders 6-3.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Curtis Granderson, Toney Douglas (yes, that's no spelling error, unless his parents made one), Blake Griffin, Todd Heap, Duane Sutter, and British soccer sensation Theo Walcott. On this day in 1872, the first FA Cup final took place with the Wanderers Royal Engineers beating Bolton 1-0. Have a great day, there is currently no new Dear Rudy, but you can learn something about kidney stones that you probably don't want to know in the Random Fact section!

Huge Price Tag - 66% of the Toronto Maple Leafs are for sale and its price is expected to reach the billions as part owner Larry Tanenbaum has the right of first refusal. Read here.

Too Complicated - A plan that would create a sports authority in charge of all of Minneapolis' new stadium projects was dismissed by legislators. Read here.

Blown Cover

Written by Rudy on March 15, 2011 - 9:31 am -

The Rudy Report is coming to you with a tsunami (too soon?!?! oh well) of news and features that will wash all your sorrows away, today on "National Workplace Napping Day." Sometimes, cops engage in undercover operations. In New York, for example, some cabs are actually police cars. However, you want to make sure that there are no hints whatsoever as to who you are. Don't blow your cover...


There is an outlandish rumor that Peyton Manning could move to the New York Jets, but it really is a wild rumor. Another crazy rumor has Sidney Crosby retiring from hockey. I guess, it's crazy rumor day! Aside from all this "March Madness", there were no real results as no New York team had any significant games.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Mike Tomlin, Kevin Youkilis, Darcy Tucker, and competitive eating legend Takeru Kobayashi. On this day in 1985, the first internet domain was registered ( Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but learn something interesting about oysters in the Random Fact section!

Prestigious Object - Canada's most prestigious sports asset, the Toronto Maple Leafs and its company MLSE, are for sale with several major parties interested in making an offer. Read here.

Banking On Athletics - Citigroup is becoming a major sponsor of the United States Olympic Committee as the 2012 Games in London are coming up. Read here.

Back In Order - San Diego Padres owner Jeff Moorad has sold his remaining 8% stake in the Arizona Diamondbacks for $21 million. Read here.

Know Your Role

Written by Rudy on March 14, 2011 - 9:46 am -

An anonymous reader recently stated that reading the Rudy Report is better and more rewarding than "winning the Mega Millions, winning the Super Bowl, and moving out of Brooklyn combined", which is yet another ringing endorsement, today on "National Organize Your Home Office Day." In order for a relationship to be successful, you need to make compromises and share things. However, for all you men out there, always remember that you can never win. Also remember that chocolate makes everything better. Therefore...


There were no games in the Premier League. There may not be any games at all in the NFL this year, which is okay, because it is only the most popular sport in the country... Nick Watney won the World Golf Championship. On Saturday, in the NHL, the Rangers beat San Jose in a shoot out thanks to a goal by Brandon Dubinsky. The Islanders lost against New Jersey. And, in the NBA, the Knicks had a loss against Indiana.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Bobby Jenks, Nicolas Anelka, Larry Johnson, and Kazakh boxing master Bakhtiyar Artayev (even he can't spell his own name correctly). On this day in 1997, 68-year old Gordie Howe signed an AHL contract with the Syracuse Crunch. Have a great week, there is currently no new Dear Rudy, but find out some more about hockey and other sports in the Random Fact section!

High Likelihood - A deal may be in the works that could have billionaire Larry Ellison buy the New Orleans Hornets and move the team to San Jose. Read here.

Brazil Big Money - Brazil's soccer league is about to sign the fourth richest media deal in the world, surpassing leagues in Spain and Germany. Read here.

Opposite Directions

Written by Rudy on March 11, 2011 - 2:01 am -

An unidentified intern in the mail room of the New York Times has dubbed the Rudy Report "the Modern Shakespeare, but more intelligent", which is a nice accolade coming from such a prestigious source, today on "National Check Your Batteries Day." Sometimes, you come to a crossroads in life and you need to make a decision as to which road to choose. Here's a pretty easy one for you...


Michael Jordan thinks that Bulls star Derrick Rose will be the NBA's MVP this season. Tiki Barber may play for the Pittsburgh Steelers soon. There were some surprise results in the Europa League: Braga beat Liverpool, while Manchester City lost against Kiev. And, in the NBA, Miami beat the LA Lakers. The Knicks played against Dallas, but the game was too late for anyone to care. Even Carmelo Anthony went to bed after the 3rd quarter.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Lee Evans, Dan Uggla, Elton Brand, Bobby Abreu, and Romanian soccer coaching legend László Bölöni (kids, don't try spelling this name at home!). On this day in 1986, New York Islanders player Mike Bossy became the first professional to score 50 goals in 9 straight seasons. Have a great weekend, there is still the Dear Rudy about disgusting birds, and learn something about your sleeping habits in the Random Fact section!

Early Signs Of Trouble - An article by the New York Times states that the Mets were already in financial trouble before they were facing charges from the Madoff trustee. Read here.

Rethinking The Investment - The English soccer organization FA is considering refinancing the debt that was used to build the new Wembley Stadium. Read here.