Recent Comments

Today September 30, 2014

Dream On

Written by Rudy on February 24, 2011 - 12:24 pm -

It is February 24th and that means that we are only 10 months away from Christmas, so the Rudy Report wants to remind you to get started with your shopping for presents, today on "National Introduce a Girl to Engineering Day." People in Africa and the Middle East are on the streets protesting. All these news make us forget that there are demonstrators amongst us, too. To live the dream, however, you have to be able to spell out your dream...


The New Jersey Nets have acquired Deron Williams. He's no Carmelo Anthony... By the way, the Knicks beat the Bucks with Anthony scoring 27 points in his debut. In the UEFA Champions League, Bayern Munich beat Inter Milan 1-0 on the road. ManU had a 0-0 draw against Marseille.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Lleyton Hewitt, Bronson Arroyo, Floyd Mayweather Jr., Zach Johnson, Alexei Kovalev, and French racing legend Alain Prost (which means "Cheers!" in German, don't drink and drive please). On this day in 1868, the first parade to have floats was staged for Mardi Gras in New Orleans. Have a great day, there is currently no new Dear Rudy, but learn something about the Simpsons that you did not know for sure in the Random Fact section!

More News Soon - Manchester United is expected to make a comment regarding the proposed GBP 1.6 billion takeover by Qatar when the quarterly numbers get released this week. Read here.

More Than They Can Chew - There are several groups interested in the New York Mets, but most of them want more than just a minority stake. Read here.

In Good Standing - World soccer governing body FIFA is reporting reserves in excess of $1.2 billion thanks to a strong World Cup in South Africa. Read here.

Anger Management

Written by Rudy on February 23, 2011 - 10:56 am -

The great thing about the Rudy Report is that it is absolutely free, which means that you can enjoy it every day, even when all your assets are frozen (Am I right, Bernie and Hosni?), like today on "International Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day." You are probably aware that ever since people in the third world got access to Twitter, they have started to demonstrate against their own governments. Most cultures are still very backwards. As you can see in the picture below, the guy is throwing a VCR and not a Blue-Ray player. Which begs the question...


After successfully trading for Carmelo Anthony, as reported first by the Rudy Report, the Knicks will set their eyes on star point guard Chris Paul next season. San Francisco Giants pitcher Brian Wilson was seen hanging out with Charlie Sheen and Lenny Dykstra. In the Champions League, Real Madrid had a 1-1 tie against Lyon. Chelsea beat Copenhagen 2-0. And, in the NHL, the Rangers beat Carolina, while the Islanders lost against Toronto.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Charles Tillman, Rondell White, Michael Campbell, Flip Saunders, and Japanese racing legend Satoru Nakajima. On this day in 1903, Cuba leased Guantanamo Bay to the United States in perpetuity. Certainly a nice spot to "hang" out... Have a great day, there is still the Dear Rudy about stock exchanges, and learn something you didn't know about Los Angeles in the Random Fact section!

Unstable Stake - Italian soccer club Juventus Turin is worried about the implications of Libya's 7.5% ownership stake in the team after riots paralyzed the country. Read here.

Kind Of A Huge Deal - The National Hockey League has signed its biggest ever sponsorship deal, worth $400 million, with a beer company. Read here.

International Rescue Efforts - The owner of a Spanish soccer team has agreed to take a stake in a club from New Zealand, injecting some much-needed funds. Read here.

German-American Merger

Written by Rudy on February 22, 2011 - 8:58 am -

For some reason, February always goes by so quickly, and it makes you wonder why they made the shortest month of the year "Black History Month," but right now, we are left in the dark about that, if you know what I mean, today on "National Be Humble Day." As you know, we currently are featuring a great Dear Rudy about the merger of the Deutsche Boerse with the New York Stock Exchange. The deal has received a lot of media attention. In the picture below, you see a Jewish trader getting all excited the moment he found out that Germans would be taking over the NYSE trading floor...


The Rudy Report is making the call that Carmelo Anthony will be a New York Knick by Thursday. The Chicago Cubs may be interested in Albert Pujols. And, in the NHL, the Islanders beat Florida 5-1.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Rajon Rondo, Michael Chang (remember him?!?!), Pat LaFontaine, Vijay Singh, Julius "Dr. J" Erving, and water polo up and coming star Robert Weiner, Jr.. On this day in 2006, at least six men staged Britain's biggest robbery ever, stealing almost $100 million from a Securitas depot in Kent. Have a great day, there is still the fantastic new Dear Rudy about the merger of the German and the New York Stock Exchange, and find out what the difference between fathers and mothers is in the Random Fact section!

Set To Continue - The mayor of Sacramento has stated that he will make every effort to build a new basketball arena whether the Kings stay in town or not. Read here.

No Happy Ending - An investor group led by a prominent filmmaker is not going to make a bid to acquire the Atlanta Thrashers, which are currently on the market. Read here.

Quite Selective - The owners of the New York Mets apparently offered a select few the chance to invest with Bernie Madoff, creating a pipeline for the fraudulent scheme. Read here.

Too Much Trouble - Bahrain has withdrawn from hosting the Formula One race in March due the country's dangerous political situation. Read here.

No Way In

Written by Rudy on February 21, 2011 - 8:26 am -

While all presidents of the United States are celebrating there birthday on the same day, which is quite weird if you think about it, the Rudy Report is working for you, the loyal readers, today on "National Love Your Pet Day." If you live in a big city, you know that there are popular places, such as clubs, bars, and restaurants where it is tough to get in unless you know somebody (or unless you're Rudy, which you're not, sorry). It seems to be almost impossible to get in here...


The New York Yankees are close to signing pitcher Kevin Millwood. Star player Antonio Cromartie, who has 9 kids from 8 women, may leave the Jets next season. Talking about good judgment... Youngster Trevor Bayne is the new hero for all rednecks. He won NASCAR's most prestigious race: The Daytona 500. There was also the NBA All-Star Game taking place in Los Angeles. Who cares who won? It was all about sneakers and bling anyways. And, in the NHL, the Rangers lost against Philadelphia.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Braylon Edwards, Ryan Smyth, Ivan Campo, and American speedcube master Bob Burton. On this day in 1948, NASCAR was incorporated. It gave people in the Midwest a reason to live... Have a great week, there is a brand-new Dear Rudy about the merger of the German and the New York Stock Exchange, and read a great comment in the Funny Sports Quote section!

Looking Feasible - A new study has found that an open-air stadium for the NFL's Atlanta Falcons is a possibility, giving hope to the franchise that a new home is on the horizon. Read here.

First Attempt - AEG has made its first official pitch to a city committee regarding the construction of an NFL stadium aimed at luring a team to Los Angeles. Read here.

A New Suitor - Filmmaker Stephen Rollins has expressed interest in leading a group of investors that could make a bid for the Atlanta Thrashers. Read here.

Catch 22

Written by Rudy on February 18, 2011 - 8:42 am -

You have been waiting all week for the arrival of the world-famous Rudy Report Weekend Edition, getting you started for President's Day weekend, today on "National Crab Stuffed Flounder Day." Every once in a while, everybody gets into a tricky situation. Dilemmas can happen anytime. Here is a typical example...


The Nets are back in negotiations with the Denver Nuggets over Carmelo Anthony with the trade deadline approaching. In the NHL, the Islanders lost against Boston in another high scoring game 6-3. The Rangers beat Los Angeles 4-3 in a shoot-out, thanks to a goal by Wojtek Wolski (a.k.a. the Wojtek Wolski Winner = WWW).

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Jermaine Jenas, Andrei Kirilenko, Alexander Mogilny, Andy Moog, and Italian soccer legend Roberto "The Divine Ponytail" (I am not making this up) Baggio. On this day in 1929, the first Academy Awards were announced. Have a great weekend, there is currently no new Dear Rudy, but find out how many people are drunk as you read this in the Random Fact section!

Optimism Spreading - The owner of the Detroit Pistons says that she is optimistic that the sale of the team to Tom Gores will close successfully. Read here.

Signing A Lease - AEG would agree to paying rent for land owned by the city as long as the plan to build an NFL stadium gets approved. Read here.

Still On The Market - There are still several interested parties that have a shot at acquiring the Dallas Stars, despite rumors that a sale may be close. Read here.

Not Able To Sue - The former owners of Liverpool FC will not be able to sue for damages in an American court, which is a setback to their efforts. Read here.