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Today March 22, 2019

Blown Cover

Written by Rudy on March 15, 2011 - 9:31 am -

The Rudy Report is coming to you with a tsunami (too soon?!?! oh well) of news and features that will wash all your sorrows away, today on "National Workplace Napping Day." Sometimes, cops engage in undercover operations. In New York, for example, some cabs are actually police cars. However, you want to make sure that there are no hints whatsoever as to who you are. Don't blow your cover...


There is an outlandish rumor that Peyton Manning could move to the New York Jets, but it really is a wild rumor. Another crazy rumor has Sidney Crosby retiring from hockey. I guess, it's crazy rumor day! Aside from all this "March Madness", there were no real results as no New York team had any significant games.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Mike Tomlin, Kevin Youkilis, Darcy Tucker, and competitive eating legend Takeru Kobayashi. On this day in 1985, the first internet domain was registered (symbolics.com). Have a great day, there is no new Dear Rudy right now, but learn something interesting about oysters in the Random Fact section!

Prestigious Object - Canada's most prestigious sports asset, the Toronto Maple Leafs and its company MLSE, are for sale with several major parties interested in making an offer. Read here.

Banking On Athletics - Citigroup is becoming a major sponsor of the United States Olympic Committee as the 2012 Games in London are coming up. Read here.

Back In Order - San Diego Padres owner Jeff Moorad has sold his remaining 8% stake in the Arizona Diamondbacks for $21 million. Read here.

Know Your Role

Written by Rudy on March 14, 2011 - 9:46 am -

An anonymous reader recently stated that reading the Rudy Report is better and more rewarding than "winning the Mega Millions, winning the Super Bowl, and moving out of Brooklyn combined", which is yet another ringing endorsement, today on "National Organize Your Home Office Day." In order for a relationship to be successful, you need to make compromises and share things. However, for all you men out there, always remember that you can never win. Also remember that chocolate makes everything better. Therefore...


There were no games in the Premier League. There may not be any games at all in the NFL this year, which is okay, because it is only the most popular sport in the country... Nick Watney won the World Golf Championship. On Saturday, in the NHL, the Rangers beat San Jose in a shoot out thanks to a goal by Brandon Dubinsky. The Islanders lost against New Jersey. And, in the NBA, the Knicks had a loss against Indiana.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Bobby Jenks, Nicolas Anelka, Larry Johnson, and Kazakh boxing master Bakhtiyar Artayev (even he can't spell his own name correctly). On this day in 1997, 68-year old Gordie Howe signed an AHL contract with the Syracuse Crunch. Have a great week, there is currently no new Dear Rudy, but find out some more about hockey and other sports in the Random Fact section!

High Likelihood - A deal may be in the works that could have billionaire Larry Ellison buy the New Orleans Hornets and move the team to San Jose. Read here.

Brazil Big Money - Brazil's soccer league is about to sign the fourth richest media deal in the world, surpassing leagues in Spain and Germany. Read here.

Opposite Directions

Written by Rudy on March 11, 2011 - 2:01 am -

An unidentified intern in the mail room of the New York Times has dubbed the Rudy Report "the Modern Shakespeare, but more intelligent", which is a nice accolade coming from such a prestigious source, today on "National Check Your Batteries Day." Sometimes, you come to a crossroads in life and you need to make a decision as to which road to choose. Here's a pretty easy one for you...


Michael Jordan thinks that Bulls star Derrick Rose will be the NBA's MVP this season. Tiki Barber may play for the Pittsburgh Steelers soon. There were some surprise results in the Europa League: Braga beat Liverpool, while Manchester City lost against Kiev. And, in the NBA, Miami beat the LA Lakers. The Knicks played against Dallas, but the game was too late for anyone to care. Even Carmelo Anthony went to bed after the 3rd quarter.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Lee Evans, Dan Uggla, Elton Brand, Bobby Abreu, and Romanian soccer coaching legend László Bölöni (kids, don't try spelling this name at home!). On this day in 1986, New York Islanders player Mike Bossy became the first professional to score 50 goals in 9 straight seasons. Have a great weekend, there is still the Dear Rudy about disgusting birds, and learn something about your sleeping habits in the Random Fact section!

Early Signs Of Trouble - An article by the New York Times states that the Mets were already in financial trouble before they were facing charges from the Madoff trustee. Read here.

Rethinking The Investment - The English soccer organization FA is considering refinancing the debt that was used to build the new Wembley Stadium. Read here.

Parachute Payments

Written by Rudy on March 10, 2011 - 9:48 am -

A new survey has found that 51.3% of readers prefer reading the Rudy Report over taking a cold shower outside in Siberia, which is up a respectable 0.8% as compared to last year, so let's be happy today on "National Middle Name Pride Day." If you look long enough, you can actually find great deals on the internet, like, for example, the Rudy Report which is free every day (so far, don't get too comfortable, folks). Here's another decent deal where the "don't ask, don't tell" rule still applies....


Formula One has given Bahrain a deadline until May 1st to decided whether the country can stage a race later in 2011. The NFL Players' Association has hired UBS to advise them on financial matters during CBA negotiations. In the NHL, the Rangers played too late for anyone to care. Same was true for the Knicks in the NBA. And, in the Champions League, Tottenham eliminated favorite AC Milan, while German team Schalke beat Valencia to advance to the next round.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Lassana Diarra (not to be confused with diarrhea due to bad lasagna), Matt Kenseth, Mike Timlin, Bobby Petrino, and FIFA president Sepp Blatter. On this day in 1977, astronomers discovered rings around Uranus. Have a great day, there is a brand-new Dear Rudy about pigeons, and learn something about Egypt that you did not know for sure despite recent media attention in the Random Fact section!

Three Is The Magic Number - Sources report that there are three separate parties interested in taking over the Atlanta Thrashers. Read here.

From The Inside - A former New York Mets officer is exploring the possibility of aligning a group to buy a stake in the struggling franchise. Read here.

Playing Defense - The chief executive of Premier League club Manchester United has defended the owners of the team and its debt load in front of British government officials. Read here.

Understandable Frustration

Written by Rudy on March 09, 2011 - 9:42 am -

A new study has found that the only thing that revolutionaries and reigning government in Libya can agree on is that reading the Rudy Report makes everything better, like today on "National Plant a Flower Day." The NCAA men's basketball tournament is starting next week and we have yet to endorse a favorite. In any case, here is a quick moment captured right after the Duke coaching staff found out that there is no Rudy Report on weekends...


Under Armour will provide apparel to Premier League club Tottenham Hotspurs. Tiki Barber (the guy with the weird head shape) says he will return to football as a running back. He won't play for the Giants though. In the Champions League, Barcelona kicked out Arsenal London to advance to the next round thanks to goals by Lionel Messi. Donzek also advanced. And, in the NHL, the Islanders beat Toronto in overtime thanks to a goal by Comeau.

The Rudy Report says Happy Birthday to Clint Dempsey, Julia Mancuso, Aaron Boone, Roy Makaay, Mike Leach, and Indian cricket sensation Parthiv Patel (not to be confused with all the other hundreds of Indian cricket players named Patel). On this day in 1959, the Barbie doll made its debut at the American International Toy Fair in New York. American International? What is it? International or American? You can't have both! Anyways, have a great day, there is a new Dear Rudy about Rudy's top enemies: pigeons, and learn something about "Sox" in the Funny Sports Quote section!

Back In Business - After seemingly being out of the race to acquire the Detroit Pistons, Mike Ilitch is back to increase his sports empire. Read here.

Judgment Day - Oakland Athletics owner Lew Wolff wants MLB commissioner Bud Selig to make a decision as to whether the team can be moved or not. Read here.

Interesting Synergies - One of the New York Mets' sponsors is exploring the possibility of taking a stake in the franchise, which could further strengthen ties. Read here.

Not Giving Up Hope - Despite reports that the Sacramento Kings will be moving to Anaheim, several developers are still looking at arena options in town. Read here.

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